Jovan Belcher, Us, and Brady Quinn's moving words

          Kansas City Chiefs linebacker Jovan Belcher fatally shot his girlfriend Kasandra Perkins and then committed suicide outside of the Chiefs practice facility in front of head coach Romeo Crennel and general manager Scott Pioli, but you already know this. You probably also know that Belcher's actions ensured that his 3 month old daughter, Zoey, would grow up an orphan. Although I don't like to think about the excruciating details of this tragedy, I think it's important to remember them so that, as a national community, we can take steps to ensure that something like this doesn't happen again. I am fully aware that gun violence, domestic abuse, and mental illness will never be fully eradicated, but that doesn't mean there aren't things we can do to prevent them from occurring so often.

Perkins' blood stains on the console of Jovan Belcher's
 Bentley Continental.

         New details have come out today that indicate Belcher's suicide was a direct response to the murder of Kasandra Perkins. After kissing his dead girlfriend and their daughter good-bye, Belcher drove from his home to the Chiefs practice facility to thank the organization for everything they had done for him. He also begged Pioli and Crennel to ensure that his daughter would be taken care of. In his mind, there was nothing left to live for, not even his daughter. He couldn't face his shame and guilt, so when he heard the police sirens coming towards him, he stepped behind a car in the facilities' parking lot and shot himself. It was a cowardly move and his second egregious crime of the morning, but I don't think he's a bad person. I believe he hated the monster he had become and could not face his demons any longer. Jovan Belcher was a sick man. Not sick in the sense of sadistic, but rather in the sense of diseased. Nobody takes their own life if they believe that the world has more to offer them than the cold grip of death does. And nobody murders the mother of their child over an argument about being out too late if they don't have deeper seeded issues.
            It's important to understand Belcher's background before we can pass judgment about his character or violent behavior. Jovan Belcher grew up on Long Island, New York, where he became a star athlete in both wrestling and football. Although he was an All-American wrestler and standout football star, he didn't receive much buzz amongst college recruiters and ended up signing with the University of Maine in 2004. He played 4 years at the University of Maine, earning first team All-American honors after his senior season. Ironically enough, he earned a degree in child development and family relations. After his death, former teachers and Coaches of Jovan called him a great student and outstanding individual, all of them shocked and puzzled as to how his life could have come to this moment. He went undrafted in the 2009 draft, but signed as a free agent with the Chiefs and made the roster his rookie season. He was considered undersized for his position, but his football smarts and work ethic earned him a spot on the roster. So far I've described a model citizen and professional athlete. Belcher was a guy who beat the odds, a perennial underdog who went about his business the right way. He did not have a history of violence or a police record, so of all people, why was he the one to lose it?
        The answer is not simple or transparent. I'm not a psychologist or a criminal investigator, so I'm not going to offer any explanation, and I don't even think it is the important thing to focus on. I think it's more important to step away and look at how Jovan Belcher's story can apply to the rest of us, and many mainstream media members have done just that.
         Bob Costas discussed the lack of institutional gun control in United States and how it will continue to plague our nation until we take steps towards change. Tony Rizzo of the Kansas City Star chose to highlight the problem of domestic abuse. Although those issues cannot be undervalued or dismissed, I thought Brady Quinn provided one of the most applicable thoughts regarding the tragedy as it pertains to the average American. You can watch it here.

        In a world that is now dominated by the Iphones in our pockets and the computers on our desks, sometimes we can lose touch with the very people that we are in constant contact with. No person or law could have stopped Belcher from doing what he did, but had his friends or relatives been able to really gauge his inner turmoil and given him proper help and attention, maybe baby Zoey would still have parents right now. The Chiefs did provide Belcher and Perkins couples counseling over the past few years, and their relationship was known to be rocky, but no one foresaw the potential violence that Belcher was capable of. He needed more personal help, and not just from professionals, but from friends and family.
       We all want to believe our athletes are gladiators, invincible warriors who go to battle for us every week. But underneath those helmets, headbands, and ballcaps, there are real people with real struggles. When one of our gladiators fall, we all pay attention. However, Belcher could be any struggling father or husband in America. We like to think men, especially fathers, are invincible, unbreakable; our strong willed and strong minded protectors. But they are under a lot of stress, and when that stress becomes too much to bear, they lash out. If we cast them off as bad people or condemn them to unjust punishment, we aren't eradicating their behavior, only exasperating it. This applies to teens, women, and children as well, but they tend to be more vocal about it. Men are often too proud to admit they are hurt, especially football players.
      In times of tragedy like this, we need to look at our friends, our loved ones, and especially ourselves, and take a moment to see if everything is okay. If the answer is no, do something about it. That is the most direct contribution we can make to help out in the wake of these events. No one can save Jovan Belcher anymore, he is gone. But we can save future Jovan Belchers in our own communities, we just need to look around every once and a while.